I fell apart.  Every piece of me crumbled to the ground.  Like chards of glass, some edges were dull, some sharp, some half broken.

I was never the same after that fall.  Then someone helped pick up and hold my broken pieces as I reassembled me.  Not the old me.  Those pieces are gone.

Then something happened and I fell apart again.  Every piece of me crumbled to the ground.  Like chards of glass, some edges were dull, some sharp, some half broken.  Not the same pieces as when I fell apart before.  These were new shapes of broken.

And again, I was never the same after that fall.  Then that same someone helped pick up and hold my broken pieces as I reassembled me.  Not the newer old me.  Those pieces are gone.

Then something happened and I fell apart again.  Every piece of me crumbled to the ground.  Like chards of glass, some edges were dull, some sharp, some half broken.  Not the same pieces as when I fell apart before.  These were new shapes of broken.

For you see, when we fall apart, we are never the same from the previous time.  We have changed.  We might fall apart for the same reason, but the shapes of the pieces are not.  And someone will hold the pieces as we re-assemble our depleted self.

To stand and move forward again. For each time EVERY PIECE OF ME IS DIFFERENT



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Teaching Schedule

Source: Teaching Schedule

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4 Lives Changed Today

Not counting just sayin’

1 – A teacher from my YTT taught her first class. Ashtanga – It was a start and she did awesome. The first class is always the nerve racking one.

2 – A yoga teacher from our area that teaches Hatha, Pranayama, and meditation took her very first Ashtanga class. Ever. – She loved it and judged herself until the teacher (see #1) added the nugget that there is no judgment in yoga). She said she normally only does 1 Sun A in her practice and teaching

3 – A woman came in to take the meditation class. 20 minute sit. As I spoke to her about Anapana (breath awareness) she said she is in restorative justice work (prison system) and signed up for 10 day Vipassana but never went. And when she saw the Meetup I created for meditation she knew the universe was telling her come. Afterward she said it was exactly what she needed and would be back. She told me she is member of Gym but she was not ready to do yoga there. She enjoyed the fact we were in a TaeKwonDo school

4 – Me. My practice changed today. Not on the mat but off as a I continue to follow my dharma path to bring yoga into the community. These 3 people changed me/ transformed me to really understand that my dharma is where I am to be heading. My true North.

Thank you also to Janelle Pham and H.K. Lee Academy of TaeKwonDo for giving us the opportunity to bring yoga into your community

 — at H.K. Lee Academy of TaeKwonDo.tkd


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Your Dharma

We are given our Dharma at birth.
It is not a gift it is our vocation, our purpose , our calling. We cannot hear it but we can feel it. We can reject it and move on another path. But in some way we will be drawn to it if we allow our Self to be open. Removed of the boundaries of what we think we should be doing. Or what we Want to do.
Have you ever looked at another being a felt the call the need to be their light.
That’s it!!
It won’t be easy. It won’t be monetarily rewarding. But no great being ever set out to be great !

It was through love gratitude kindness and joy that they practiced their Dharma

They became great beings in our eyes not their own.

Give it Send it. Don’t expect anything in return. Yet what does come your way use in service to turn it around back into the universe.

You will break a little to let the light in. But once that light ignites you, you take this new light into the world

Just BE


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When We See But Cannot Hear

As I was sitting in church yesterday I was looking out a window at dead leaves blowing on mostly barren trees.  The morning was chilly with a breeze.  The sun was casting shadows about.  The leaves were pale brown, as they are during the winter.  Even with unseasonable warm weather, the buds on older trees in Chapel Hill, NC were not visible.

I have messaged in the past of dead leaves holding on to the branch even though the majority have let go and fallen to the ground.   Yet there were several bunches of leaves determined to remain on these tree.  What did they fear?  Falling, being separated from the branch that once fed them, unable to move beyond? Or just waiting for the new buds to come, so that where they are connected to the branch will not be empty; their attachment place.

Now the breeze would pick up and the leaves would move but I could only see this.  I could not hear the leaves touching to make the “rustling” sound I am familiar with.  If I had closed my eyes to listen, I would not have heard.  For what the eyes see, I cannot hear, and what I hear, I  cannot see.

It is a real struggle at times to let go and listen to the heart  Attachment creates suffering.

Holding on to that which is no longer giving life, joy, freedom, but becoming incapable of letting go because of the fear of falling, becoming separated, or unable to move beyond.

I realized that I was observing the trees and leaves I was able to become aware of the clear cloudless blue sky beyond the trees.  What a most beautiful sky.  Because i was fixated on the struggle of the leaves, I was unable to see the backdrop of the sky.  Then I heard the priest talking of the 2011 French  movie “The Artist”.

The majority of the movie is silent other than music.   But when the main character hears a glass as he places it on the dressing table, it is the first sound in the movie.  Yet he cannot hear himself.  He then finds sound to be an extreme annoyance rather than a means of discovery.

Maybe this is why we can see but unable to listen.  To hear but unable to listen.

Whether to the sounds of leaves, of life, our hearts, or to another, a feather falling



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Prism of Life

Light enters the prism from one angle, one color, one shape. Inside the prism, the light bends, explores, then emerges into hues of color and new light.
Such is our time with each other. We allow people into our prism of life, their good light. When we bend the light with honor and love it becomes our healing light.. When it emerges from us, our space, the hues of color, of life, explode into of kindness, love, compassion, caring, oneness. We then share this light with another.

A double rainbow is hard to find. When we together bend the light,  our rainbows, side by side with each other, unite with the Divine.


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Tape Measure Heart

Externally we are all different, like a snowflake, flower, blades of grass.  Our shapes and sizes vary.

These Dimensions are what make you UNIQUE, SPECIAL, PERFECT!

Dimension Inside You are also make you UNIQUE, SPECIAL, PERFECT!!

Common words and phrases are used to describe sensations and emotions but how you FEEL these is not ‘one size fits all’.

Your Breath, Heart, Compassion, Life Experiences, how these FEEL on the inside are your Dimensions.  Empty, Aching, Conflicted, Full of Life, Bright Love, ever so deep Caring Kindness.  Even your Smile on the Inside.

We close off or hold a space for others to JUST BE…in the Dimension of the moment.



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Be True to Yourself First

108 Sun Salutes

“Be True to Yourself”  I’ve heard and read this many times but never really comprehended what it meant.  How? In what way? And how do I know if I am or aren’t?

Some days are just great but lately everything seems to be a struggle.  Well not everything, my meditation practice is getting easier to make time to sit, my yoga asana practice is consistent, I still enjoy running, and biking.  And hope to get into the pool more.  But something is missing.

My work focus is not what it should be.  I lose concentration as I drift like from one feeling to the next during the day.  The company I work for is being sold so this may be contributing as I do not know if my department will remain.

But how to ‘Be True to Myself’ first.

Write it Down – Spend time exploring the feelings you are having.  Journal or just write down what you are feeling and why?  Sometimes it’s hard to verbally express them to someone, even someone close, for fear of judgement.  If you’ve been hurt before by telling someone you’ll likely to hold it in.  Even repressing the feelings.  Writing in a journal does not have to be fancy or even grammatically correct.  I find if I try to write a certain “correct” way, I get stuck.  Just let it flow.

Feelings are not Wrong – Has anyone said “You’re not supposed to feel that way.”   Feelings we have are never wrong.  WE have a specific way of feeling with every experience.  And whether someone else believes it not right to feel a certain way, they are misguided.  Hell they’re wrong.  I was once told I should not feel sad about losing a pet.   Well why the hell not.  The dog was a part of my family.  It was like losing a loved one.  Explore your feelings and if someone says “You’re not supposed to feel that way.”, then you have to power to tell them how you feel about THAT!!!

Be Honest – Do you hold back, not tell the whole truth.  Swerve around issues or uncomfortable situations?   Being honest, from my point of view, is about being open and truthful in all you say and do.  Be available for feedback and don’t hide it or think it will blow over.   It will come back to haunt you.  It always does.  With social media and search engines you never know where you’ll turn up.

Allow Yourself Time – “Time is the one thing I need but never have.”   Allow yourself time to develop and be open.  When I do not have enough time, I then know I need to reassess all the stuff I am doing.  I am not a list maker and oh do I have hard time saying NO.  Which gets me into more hot water than I realize until it’s a rolling boil.  It’s easy to say and harder to do.

Be Compassionate with Yourself – It’ OK.  Don’t beat yourself up.   Create a mantra, an affirmation of the best parts of you.  Write it down and carry it with you where ever you go.  Yes even to bed.  Laminate it to protect it.  If it becomes tattered or torn, it most likely will at some point, write down again.

Say it to yourself and let others know what it is.  Change it if you feel the need.  But never stop.

Now I am not a doctor, philosopher, or have any formal training.  This comes from the heart.  The center of my experiences.  Hopefully you find something that helps.



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I greet yoga each day as a friend I can release my deepest wounds to without judgement or commentary.  Not anger or hurtful, but solace and calm.  Staying with breath to relax the mind, open my heart.

Awakening, just awakening to follow the path God has set forth.  HIS path that guides me. Not to turning away but to follow.  And along this path to accept, embrace and awaken to that to The Divine.

St Jude is the patron saint of the lost cause.  Ganesha removes obstacles.  Faith and practice bring it all together.

Last week someone wrote me “You’re beautiful…precisely as the divine intended!”  I’m not sure I believed that completely last week.  But it’s progressing.

One cannot expect to heal without caring for the wound. Let our practice be our medicine. Our breath to wash the wound, asana and pranayama as the ointment and dressing, meditation to observe and release allowing the healing to progress.  Not in an instant but over time.  Rushing healing is like pulling the bandage off too soon.  It will happen over the course.

The wounds we have carried over time did not happen in an instant.  Do not rush it.  But nurture.

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When the Heart Sings

When the Heart Sings.

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